Easter in Denmark is a family affair that involves lots of food, decorations and sweets.

For my first official Danish Easter, especially one where being home more during the lock-down makes you want to sit around eating candy all day, I did what all good Americans do:

Raid the supermarkets the day after the holiday and buy up all the discounted candy.

From the molar-breaking to the delightfully chewy, here is a ranking of Danish Easter candy by one very sweet tooth-experienced American.

7. Sukkeraeg

Quick PSA for American readers:

🚨 This is NOT, I repeat, NOT. A. JELLYBEAN. 🚨

I found out this very rude fact after excitedly buying this, expecting to have my pick of a ton of yummy flavors, and selecting an orange “sugar egg” to start. I bit down on it like you would on something that you’re expecting to be chewy.

And I’m pretty sure I almost broke my tooth.

I got through the shell all right, and opening it released a small amount of sugary, orange-flavored liquid.

Gross.

Apparently, the name “sugar egg” is more accurate than I expected.

At first, I thought they were horribly defective jellybeans, but no – they are just not jellybeans at all.

HUGE DISAPPOINTMENT.

Now I’d like to mention from the beginning that I later found out by speaking with some Danes that Curré is in fact made in Germany. That was both comforting (as I don’t have to offend anyone by saying they’re terrible) and very discomfiting (because now I’ll get lots of angry comments telling me this has no business on a list of Danish candy).

The problem is, a title like “A Ranking of Easter Candy You Can Find in Denmark” just doesn’t have the same ring to it…

In the words of a very wise judge, “Don’t write me any letters. I won’t read them.”

6. Påskeskum

These “Easter cream” bunnies were the first Easter candy I tried, and I was so excited because everything about their appearance and packaging immediately suggested “MARSHMALLOW.”

I thought these pastel bunnies were going to be fluffy and light, in the vein of American Peeps.

But in a similar (but honestly not nearly as bad) upset as the non-jellybeans, they were just chewy. It took a ton of effort just to bite them – the type where you have to pull it away from your mouth in order to break off a piece – so much that I couldn’t even enjoy it!

Ondra, on the other hand, loved ’em. To each his own teeth-breaking candy!

5. Fugleaeg

Anthon Berg is a well-known chocolate and candy-maker in Denmark, but this was missing something for me.

I liked the many colors, but there was no real variation between them.

There was a hard shell on the outside with what looked like a really thin chocolate layer, and then marzipan. I wanted a little more of a chocolate element. The marzipan left something to be desired.

Perhaps it was just that these are ‘mini,’ and I wanted more flavor than I could get.

Oh well! There are many more eggs in the sea nest.

4. Nougataeg

What it sounds like! A candy shell fashioned very convincingly to look like an egg, but full of creamy nougaty goodness.

If you’re not a nougat fan (like Ondra), it’s clearly not for you. But good for a quick pop and a sip of coffee.

3. Curré Marcipanaeg

Honestly, these marzipan eggs are where it’s at. They come in smaller packs (usually three) and that’s because they’re jam-packed with chocolatey and dense almondy flavor – you gotta take it slow.

One for me, one for Ondra, and one for me to split in half for both of us.

He didn’t even mind the nougat center! It was well complimented by the surrounding marzipan.

Overall these were great, but the marzipan was a little dryer than in the next selection.

2. Spangsberg Chokolade Marcipanaeg

Serious bonus points here for writing the “MARZIPAN WITH 51% ALMONDS” and “WITH DARK CHOCOLATE,” both of which had me salivating before I even left the store. Numbers and adjectives work, folks!

Plus, extra points for design:

Unlike the Curré equivalent, these chocolate-coated eggs have lovely lines criss-crossing them, making them look even more delicious.

It truly is the little things in life that matter.

The marzipan impressed – moist and with a strong almond flavor (as promised)! You could eat half and feel satisfied, that’s how dense and filling (sweet tooth-wise, I mean) it was. You probably shouldn’t substitute it for your lunch – almond content doesn’t count as nutrition.

1. THE WINNER: Whiskyaeg

Now, look: I’d rather eat the marzipan egg over this, but you can’t eat quite as many of them, especially if you’re an Easter candy glutton.

These look very similar to the nougat eggs (#4), they are just a lighter, pale yellow. And they are not messing around: You can really taste the whiskey. And it is FANTASTIC.

Especially since I like a lil something sweet with my coffee, this is my choice for an awesome candy that you can eat more of at one time, spreading your enjoyment out as you nosh 🙂

In the photograph is actually my “our” SECOND bag!

And in our “better luck next year” category: Haribo Lakridsaeg

Don’t get me wrong.

I’ve been easing into eating licorice here and there as time goes on, but I’m just not ready for this much excitement and uncertainty.

Plus, that hat-tipping licorice egg on the bottom right looks like he’s going to eat me rather than the other way around. And I’m not here for it.

What’s your favorite Easter or seasonal candy?